This year’s theme was ‘Larger than Life’ and entertainers included Michael Jackson and Elvis Presley-themed stilt walkers and Vegas-style showgirls. So far so good. I managed to catch a glimpse of former Miss SA Jo-Anne Strauss, FHM hottie Roxy Louw and swimming sensation, Ryk Neethling… even better! I tried to get a bit closer to Mr. Neethling. After all, when you’ve seen a man in speedos you feel like you know him intimately.
My companion meanwhile was goggling a bevy of beauties gliding past as if they were walking on water. I just don’t understand how some girls manage it – I clearly need more practice as my heels kept digging into the grass. Hair, nail and eyelash extensions dominated among the ladies – presumably for the Larger Than Life theme – with the result that many girls looked like Kim Kardashian clones. It made me want to rebel, so when Karen Zoid took to the stage I kicked off the heels, whipped my hair back and forth and rocked out! Well I would have, but my heels were stuck again and I couldn’t get to the stage.
True to the theme of the event the weather was hot hot hot and the few shaded areas were jealously guarded. I encountered a further problem when, having finally elbowed my way to a spot under a tree I realised that sitting on the ground might not be great for my beautiful new dress… but I swallowed my pride and sat, trying to keep my dress covering my crotch while eating with chopsticks and drinking beer. Yes, it was a doomed attempt, but I consoled myself with the fact that I was in fact being sensible by staying out of the sun.
Then it was time for the main race of the day and I was carried on the general wave of people to the side of the racecourse. I was betting on the two favourites, Pocket Power and Mother Russia. Had I not been so tipsy, I might even have bought a ticket. When the fillies came frolicking past, the cheers and rants were definitely for ‘my’ horses… but then out of the blue, came a new superstar – Past Master. All very exciting but it was time to leave. After all, now that I was all warmed up I had a date with the sunset, a Margarita and 5FM beats at St. Yves in Camps Bay. Let the night begin….